Living with Scleroderma

this is nothing but a curve ball

Chemo #6 and Chemo #7 DONE

on October 7, 2012

It’s crazy that all of a sudden, our calendars are now filled with back to back doctor visits, tests and chemotherapy. Going to the hospital is so exhausting. I never thought I’d be going this much for myself. It’s almost rare to see a week without any activities pertaining to Scleroderma.

But for the most part, my visits and treatments are encouraging. Even some of the bad news don’t seem so bad when I realize that things could be a lot worst. And for that, I’m happy.

Chemo #7
Chemo #7

My last chemo was a little emotional. Not for me really, but for 2 other patients that I was next to.

The first one was an elderly man that was accompanied by his daughter and 2 grand daughters (probably in their 20s). They came in, a little loud, but they didn’t really care. I tried not to mind them. Besides, my meds were already kicking in so I fell asleep.

When I woke up, the old man was by himself. Then I saw him struggling to sit up from his chair. Hubby tried to help him up and called the nurse for him. As it turns out, he was already done with his treatment.

The ladies that accompanied him left him there, all by himself, so they can eat out. I felt so bad. I wouldn’t leave my dad or grandfather alone like that. I mean, there were 3 of them, they could’ve taken turns to eat while someone stayed to look after him.

Soon after his IV was removed, the elderly man walked away (probably looking for his companions). He came in a wheelchair and shouldn’t really be walking after treatment because he was probably a little weak and dizzy. I saw him pass by outside my room and moments later, I heard a loud thump. He fell and hit his head. A few minutes later, his daughter and grand daughters came back from eating and got upset at the nursing staff for not watching him the entire time.

I felt bad he fell, but it wasn’t the nursing staff’s fault. They have other patients to attend to. And He was already done. His family should have at least come back on time to take care of him.

Then, when I went to the restroom we were sharing with another patient, my heart sank when I looked at the floor. I saw pieces of hair all over the floor. Obviously it was a cancer patient that’s losing his/her hair due to chemotherapy. I’ve been blessed enough to keep my hair with treatment. But I can’t even begin to think how difficult it must be to lose your hair in addition to all the other stress and pain you’re going through when you’re sick.

My heart went out to that other patient and I was just quickly reminded of how much blessed I am even during this time.

Things are not perfect right now, but that’s OK. I’m learning to praise God in all my circumstances. Because all these trials don’t compare to His amazing plan in our life.


One response to “Chemo #6 and Chemo #7 DONE

  1. Leah says:

    Not to focus on other less important things here Kristine, but I’m glad you mentioned how people don’t see it from the eyes of the nursing staff. I feel for that man, and I do believe that it’s still the family’s responsibility to care for their loved one, if they really are their loved one. Like you said, there were 3 of them there. The nursing staff could’ve restrained the patient so that he couldn’t get up and fall, but what for? He has the right to do what he wants as long as he can make decisions for himself. Besides, that’s another complaint the family can make.. “why is my father/grandfather restrained?”…. it’s again the nurse’s fault… I just hope he’s alright.

    More importantly, stay strong Kristine =) Love you!

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